Fortieth Birthday Post #17: Disclaimer to My Employer

Ok, Employer, Chill Out. Most (if not all) of these posts were composed during non-working hours. My record shows I had a day off yesterday. And my posts all are time-stamped prior to the start of my workday, or will be after. Ok?

Please, please, don't report me to Human Resources. The guy who runs that department, despite being devastatingly handsome, is OLD!